Monday, August 08, 2005

At a loss...

There's this sinking feeling that I just can't shake. There's something going on. Something I can't control. Something that will make me roll over. Something unsettling. Although I can sense all of these things, I cannot bring myself to understand what the root of all of this is.

A part of me already knows and doesn't want to acknowledge it. That would be much too easy, and obviously, denial and I get along well together.

Proving myself was hard, but I guess starting over again to overcome something that should not have even occured will be much more difficult. I know that I have what it takes to be and do what I want, which is so much bigger than anything else I could have possibly imagined. I'm losing ground in the battle for opportunity.

Maybe I should take a shot at it. Maybe I should suck it up. Maybe I should just forget about it and keep on keepin' on. Maybe I'm imagining things.

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